Tired of life
Alright, shall do a quick blogging. Yea, have been really busy with uncle's funeral. I need to go over later too. Couldnt find much time to spend with Elijah although i really wish to spend those times with him. But when i have the time, he wasnt at the right mood. Yea, kind of sucky huh. But well, tomorrow's the last day i'm off for funeral and that is it. Anyway, chat up with geraldine the other day. Well, misunderstanding cleared. No more starings and no more calling of bitch. By the way, "bitch" jessie always called actually referred to ME. *ouch. I dont know why did that hurt but yes, ouch. Anyway, up till this stage, i dont really care much if they like me or not. All that matters is just Elijah. I'm still working towards that goal of being close and loving, but it doesnt seems to be nearing, always so far away. Today, FINALLY, i get to go back home with baby. But it was kind of a short one. The question that always stuck in my head, ''Does he even missed me a lil ?'', it just wouldnt go away. We may seem fine from the front, but deep down, we both know that we aint doing fine. I miss him, really do. I miss him real bad, VERY bad. Honestly, i dont feel loved. And yes, I hate myself now. I'm being SO pessimistic, i dont know why. I'm kind of really tired of life and I just couldnt find the strength to pass each and everyday. Alright, said enough. I'm gone.
With love, on Monday, July 31, 2006
xxx This scene is DEAD xxx
xxx This scene is DEAD xxx
